16 Everyday Actions You Can Take to Help End Violence against Women

Every year, activists around the world collaborate during 16 Days of activism against gender-based violence to raise awareness about the issue. The campaign which takes places between November 25-December 10 is a global effort to highlight the various forms of violence against women as well as other gendered violence that cause harm. The struggle against violence against women, of course, goes beyond this campaign. We all can do something, albeit small, to contribute to ending gendered violence in our daily lives. Here are sixteen actions suggested by members of Free Women Writers.

1. If someone tells you about an act of violence or harassment they have faced, don’t question them or their feelings and don’t question what they were doing or wearing. No one deserves gendered harassment or violence. Instead say,“I’m sorry that happened to you. You don’t deserve that. I’m here if you want to talk anytime.” It is not your job to investigate whether or not something happened (90% of women in major cities have faced harassment. Globally, 1 in 3 women have faced physical or sexualized violence. Your friends, sisters or colleagues are among these women.You don’t have to talk about the issue, but you can throw a self-care party for the women in your life and just relax, drink tea, read poetry, and hang out.
2. Support women’s businesses and institutions that employ women. Financial abuse is a pervasive problem and contributing to women’s economic empowerment is key.
3. Don’t discredit or silence someone who has faced violence, especially in front of your children, because that might signal to them, that if they come to you, you won’t believe them either.  
4. It is our communal silence that normalizes and sustains violence against women. Next time you witness harassment or violence of any kind, if you feel safe in doing so, call out the perpetrator. This can be done in non-combative ways. For example, you can ask them why they did what they did and how they would feel if they faced the same.
5. Share our book You Are Not Alone, a guidebook for women facing abuse, with your friends and family. While it is written for Afghan women, the book provides useful tips for survivors anywhere. Find it on Amazon in English, or download it in Pashtu or Persian. 
6. Violence is not always physical or sexualized. Sometimes daily micro-aggressions can contribute to the normalization of violence. It is important to recognize and act on these micro-aggressions. For example, if someone in your family has a habit of “joking” about how women are inferior or stupid, call them out. Make it clear that you don’t tolerate that behavior and you believe women deserve the same rights and respect as others. This may seem small, but it makes a difference because people will think twice before saying those words and phrases again.
7. Share the poetry, writings, and artwork of survivors of violence with your online community. Here is a poem to get you started.  
8. If you have children, treat your daughters and sons equally and engage both in house work.
9. Don’t judge women who choose to stay in abusive relationships or not speak up. You don’t know the circumstances of other women. They may luck the financial security to leave an abusive home or they might be emotionally manipulated and abused and not able to see the reality of the abuse they face. If you judge someone who is facing abuse, she’ll be less likely to come to you for support when she needs it. You can’t free someone else from abuse if they are not ready, but you can let them know that you’re there for them when they need you.
10. If you have children, occasionally remind them that you’re there if they want to talk about anything.
11. In meetings, family dinners, conferences, panels, or other venues where you have a voice, make sure women’s voices and stories are included and listened to. If one or two men are hogging the conversation, turn to a woman sitting at the table and ask them what their opinion is or ask for participation from others without singling one person out. Say things like “I wonder what others around the table think about this issue,” “I think women experience this differently. What do you think, ladies?”
12. Donate to your local shelter or an organization that works for ending violence against women.