Written by Shamila Kohestani
It has been over a month since the Guardian published an article bringing light to allegations of sexual harassment within the Afghan Football Federation. The first week, I found myself glued to the news and I was constantly refreshing my Twitter feed to learn more about the investigation. I went to bed uneasy, knowing how much joy soccer brought me and imagining the pain some of the other players had faced.
The second week, my sadness and discomfort turned to anger, as I became increasingly frustrated with how the situation was being manipulated in the news and on social media. Today, however, I am optimistic. You may ask yourself: how can someone be optimistic when the very institution that gave her the opportunity to gain independence, strength, and freedom is now synonymous with harassment, degradation, and the oppression of women? Here is my answer.
While the allegations of sexual abuse have been devastating, they have shown us the strength and resolve of Afghan women. In the past month we have begun to see the tide turn as hundreds have raised their voices to support the Afghanistan Women’s National Football Team. “Teammates” is no longer a term reserved for those who wear the same jersey, but now also includes the reporters and activists who have come forward in support of the survivors and demanded that the truth be told. I firmly believe that this is just the beginning. Many others will come forward to raise their voices and tell their stories.
This can be an opportunity for us to redefine “honor.”
In Afghanistan, we often value the honor of our families highly but we haven’t really defined what “honor” entails. Historically, our definition of honor has been patriarchal, teeing women’s identity to men’s ego. That’s changing. Now, we are saying that it is not honorable to blame a victim. It is not honorable to spread false information to attempt to discredit her accusations. It is not honorable to silence her by using religion. It is not honorable to objectify and degrade her. It is not honorable to humiliate her for coming forward and sharing her story. It is not honorable to defend sexual abusers and enablers.
Creating a safe environment for women to gain independence and strength through sports is honorable. Standing against misogyny and patriarchy is honorable. Searching for the truth is honorable. Standing up in the face of adversity is honorable and this is exactly what the women of the Afghan Women’s National Soccer Team have done.
We have heard the critics of these strong women ask why they were “silent for so long,” but what they fail to understand is that the society we live in discredits, ostracizes, and shames women for being sexually assaulted. Their abusers know this and thrive on this behavior. They believe that these women will not speak out against them out of fear of violent repercussions at the hands of their own families or community members. It is this culture of communal silence that has forced women into silence. Being silent in the face of abuse is never a choice made freely.
In addition, we have learned that the sexual harassment within the Afghan Football Federation was known among athletes and employees for some time. The survivors are not the only people who have stayed silent. There are also the enablers who allowed this environment to grow and for women to be left vulnerable. Why must we blame the survivors when we knew people in positions of power turned a blind eye? Survivors shouldn’t have to carry the burden of changing culture while they are dealing with their own trauma.
It is everybody’s responsibility.
It is everybody’s responsibility to speak up when a woman is being sexually abused. It is imperative that we create a space for victims to speak up, shift the discussion around gender norms and sexual harassment, dismantle victim blaming and derogatory representations of women in the media, and encourage women to speak out. Only then can we begin the process of eliminating the culture of sexual abuse ingrained in our society.
In the past month, we have made greater strides in confronting sexual harassment within Afghan athletics than we ever before. But our work is far from over and there are specific things the Football Federation can do to create a safe environment for its athletes.
This is an opportunity for the Afghan Football Federation and other government and non-government offices to create new sexual harassment policies, establish reporting systems where abusers are held accountable, and take steps to support women. The AFF could completely separate the Women’s Committee from the Football Federation, employ more women at the Women’s Committee, or even have it run completely by women. The Federation could also sponsor educational initiatives to inform women of their options for reporting sexual harassment and train men on how to be better allies to female athletes. The Ministry of Women’s Affairs and the Afghan Olympic Committee could play a bigger role in monitoring the activities of the Federation.
Beyond this specific case, we know that sexual harassment is endemic and deeply rooted within our society. Abuse did not start with nor will it end with the Afghan Football Federation. Each and every one of us is responsible for raising their voice when witnessing sexual harassment. Let’s put an end to victim-blaming and support and listen to women and other survivors. Let’s make it known that women facing abuse are not alone. No more enabling, no more looking the other way, and no more excuses for powerful men!
Shamila Kohestani is a former captain of the Afghanistan Women’s National Football Team, a winner of the Arthur Ashe Courage Award, and an advocate for equality.